OMG, get that child a jacket!

“What’s wrong with you?! A 2 year old in 43 degree weather without a jacket?
And no snow pants? What’s your problem?”

No…excuse me…but what’s YOUR problem?!

I know you, I saw you looking at us at the park. Your eyes got to the size of dinner plates and your jaw dropped. I mean it literally dropped. You could’ve parked a mid size toy truck in your mouth.

We shrug it off though. We’re used to it by now. The judgmental looks and sometimes the comments.

My favorite one being:

“Why isn’t he wearing a beanie?!”
Or
“You shouldn’t let him walk down the stairs by himself he’s gonna fall and get hurt”

Well.

Dear concerned citizen,
It is true that my son was at the park today wearing a flannel shirt and jeans and a “baseball style cap” with ear flaps.

However, please know that he ISN’T cold and he isn’t going to die any time soon.

Here is why:
Despite your worst fears I am a good mom, I just don’t force my kid to do stuff he doesn’t want to. So if he doesn’t want to wear a jacket he doesn’t have to. BUT, I’m also not stupid. Therefore he already has a long sleeved 100% wool sweater on underneath, and 100% wool long johns. His “baseball hat” is double wind proof fleece fabric. So even though what you see is a two year old in a fleece shirt, jeans and a hat, trust me, he is SNUG AS A BUG IN A RUG!

So take your snarky comments and your condescending looks and put your energy on something worthwhile. (Like actually engaging in play while at the park instead of texting on your cellphone.)

Regards

The mom and dad playing on the jungle gym with their perfectly warm 2 year old.

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Hatred isn’t innate behavior – it is learned

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(Text says: “…and everyone love and respect each other…”)

What do you want your legacy to be?
What do you want your children to remember about you?
What do you want people to say about you behind your back?

You can’t force people to think a certain way or act a certain way. People have tried but failed. (Hitler – remember him?)
What you can do is try your best to make who you think you are and how you think you act, how you perceive yourself match the real you, the person you want to be.

If you don’t want your mother fcking child to be cursing so goddamn much when he’s friggin four years old then watch your own language.

If you want your child to be well mannered – lead by example. Actions always speak way louder than words. Help you neighbor, carry groceries for someone or help someone across the street. If you’re new to it, set a goal of doing one good thing a day. In a year you’ll have 365 good deeds to be proud of.

If you want people to speak well about you behind your back – you can’t. (Wait what?!) The first thing you have to remember is that people are individuals. Just as you probably don’t like everybody you meet, everybody’s probably not going to like you. And what did I say in the beginning? You can’t force people to do the things you want them to do (at least not I the long run) People will be saying what they want behind your back but if you choose to do good and choose to be good you strengthen the odds of that being something good.

WWJD – what would Jesus do? If you’re in doubt or don’t feel like you have what it takes to do something or you just “don’t wanna”. Take he time to ask yourself “what would Jesus do?”. Jesus would choose to do good and he would choose to go the extra mile. You can too.

Start with something simple. Start with yourself and your children in you have any. If you want the world to be a better place teach your children that it is. If you want the world to be more loving teach your children to be loving, lead by example.

Hatred begets hatred. I’m not saying that you should lie to your kids and tell them the world is a perfect place. I’m simply saying that if all they hear is negativity and how bad the world is and how bad they are, they going to start believing in it and it’s going to turn into a self fulfilling prophecy. 2 year olds don’t need to be watching the news live broadcast from the latest war zone. 7 year olds need not be playing R rated video games. Don’t expect your 9 year old to truly understand the concept of divorce or know how to deal with it if you as a 22, 35 or 45 year old don’t understand or know how to deal with it.
Don’t leave your infant crying alone in a crib and don’t lock your child in his/her room at night so you can go grocery shopping in peace. Don’t tell your 4 year old that she can’t play with Lisa cuz Lisa has two mommies. Don’t scold your 5 year old for talking to a “scary biker”.

If you want the world to be a better place, show your children that it can be, show them that it is.

What do you think? Can we change the world for the better or are we already screwed? 😉

Ps. I may not make the cutest drawings in the world but I really enjoy doodling. So if you must comment on the doodles – be nice!

Olympic Games 2014….and the winner is…

I’d like to say that today has been productive. I’ve done a lot of things but at the same time ended up doing nothing.

I was suppose to prepare for a potential interview coming up.

Instead I entered what must be the Olympic Games version of procrastination.

So. Starting tomorrow I’m going to organize my life. I’m going to make a battle plan and by God in going to read through that stupid paper even if it means having to lock myself in the bathroom to do so.

It has always amazed me that I am amazing when it comes to helping people remember things, running errands for other people etc but trying to organize my own life has always seemed as daunting of a task as asking a slug to climb Mount Everest. So, I’m going to see if it’s possible to trick myself into becoming organized by becoming my own personal assistant. Tomorrow I’ll work out a plan of attack.

…and a plan on how to stick to it….

Update:
You know it’s bad when you find yourself googling “how to organize your life” followed by “how to remember to check your planner”. Yep. It’s that bad.

A high five…to the face…with a chair

We’ve all been there. We’ve all met people that deserves high fives, we probably see them on a daily basis. Then there’s also always that one person who deserves a high five to the face with a chair.

When you become pregnant people flock around you to tell you that your gorgeous, your hair is thick and you are absolutely radiant.

Right?

Wrong!

When you become pregnant the world around you goes bat crap crazy over night. And I’m not talking about the coworker who at 34 weeks asked me in the lunch room ” have you gained weight?” I brushed it off, chuckled and said, “well I hope so I that’s gonna be one scrawny baby”, pulled up my work shirt and showed my ginormous tshirt covered pregnant belly. (What was I supposed to say? “Idk have I?”)

No I’m talking about the crazy ladies who tell you EVERYTHING that was painful during their pregnancy, that went wrong, that could go wrong and if they don’t have their own story to tell they always have a friend of a friend’s story to tell. My favorites include:

– When I was 12 weeks pregnant I got into a hot tub. I had a miscarriage a few days later. I’m pretty sure the hot tub roasted my baby alive in there but I was too afraid to ask the doctor if that was the case. (What’s the comeback to that story?)

– you know when they say morning sickness they really mean all day sickness….24/7……for nine months! (I was about 10 weeks at that time and just wanted to sucker punch her)

– OMG and I had all these weird cravings! I would make sammies with mayo, ketchup, mustard, anchovies and chicken on them and I’d eat like a foot long in one sitting! (This after I told her I didn’t feel like eating cuz I was too nauseated.)

– did you know that if you have sex while pregnant the man’s penis can poke the baby in the head and give it brain damages. (I so wanted to ask her if that’s what had happened to her…….it’s actually impossible for that to happen)

– I was in labor for 36 hours and lemme tell ya, I felt e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g! (Gee thanks, cuz that’s not going to get me all nervous about child birth?!)

– Mine was born in week 28 cuz I got preeclampsia. Doctors said my sodium levels were through the roof. Did you want chips? (Ehm….I’m gonna pass on that one)

I get it. Women want to share. It’s just that some people should share a little less. And some a little more. Like the woman who kept changing sides of the road every time
she passed me at the the beginning or end of a shift. I finally resided to say Hello a little extra clearly and she said hi back and explained that she didn’t want to pass near me because she was smoking and didn’t want my unborn baby to be getting second hand smoke. (And there I was thinking she was just being a jerk).

Don’t lose hope out there. There are a lot of good people, and a handful that are bat crap crazy. Don’t believe me? Get pregnant and find out for yourself!

Happy ending – f*ck conformity

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I am human, I make mistakes and so when I read the Daily Prompting to write about happy endings and something you had quit I thought I’d write a post about conformity. And about quitting it.

When I was pregnant I read every book on the planet, every parenting or baby magazine, every tv show. I read or watched it ALL. I knew exactly how we were going to raise our kid. I was determined to conform and do what everybody else did come hell or high water.

So I decorated a nursery – cuz everybody else did
I made my husband drive me to Hickville USA to get a crib
And I googled cloth diapers.

Then came junior. Then came junior and our lives were turned upside down. All of a sudden we had out little ball of love who refused to sleep unless snuggled up on somebody, woke up 5 billion times at night to nurse and pooped and peed 15 times a day for the first little while. A junior who when we left the hospital weighed in at barely 5 lbs.

After our stay at the hospital (family birthing center) I knew conformity wasn’t for me. Every ounce in my body screamed that it was wrong. That the baby should be sleeping with us, in our room and that Pampers was Gods gift to the new parent. It was hard at first giving up all the plans we had made, realizing we wouldn’t be sleeping in his pretty room and his far too expensive crib. Hard because everybody around us was doing it that way and we just couldn’t. So we quit. Quit trying to conform, quit trying to be like everybody else. We bought a cosleeper and let junior bunk with us (a decision that would save his life, turns out) and we stuffed that diaper Paul with disposables until the cows come home. I think that’s when I realized I wasn’t going to be parenting like everybody else around me. For me it was a happy ending and at the same time a very happy beginning. Two years later, I’m still glad I quit.

Cha cha cha changes!

I found myself downtown today. ALONE! For real!

Let me take it from the beginning. Junior and u have pretty much been attached to each other since he was born. We’ve slowly tried to get him to spend some quality time with dad and it’s been going ok…for about 5-10 minutes and then I’m the one again,
I have been able to sneak away to the convenient store a couple of times (with varying results) then today as I was leaving to go to the pharmacy junior noticed me fully dressed. My husband immediately jumped in and said “mommy’s going bye bye. She’s going downtown for a while but she’ll be back, you can stay here with me and play and have lots of fun.”
(This is where Junior would normally start putting his shoes on…)
Today he just looked up at his dad as if he was satisfied with that answer, looked at me, waved bye bye and blew kisses at me. So I did the same and left.

Guess what?
He was just dandy!

Him and my hubby played for about an hour by themselves and then when I was on my way back my husband showed him me on “Find a friend” and he could follow mommy home and see that I was as getting closer.

I LOVE IT!!!!!!

Ok I admit it, it was super weird in the beginning and I missed the little rascal but I pulled myself together, haha.

I’m so glad they are finally getting to spend some quality time just the two of them doing fun stuff together. I got a picture of them building a tower out of all the Lego pieces. It was taller than the toddler haha! It was great!

Today has been an awesome day! Yay for toddlers growing up!

Thank you

It seems like we’re all pretty good at thanking people. Thanking the. For gifts or that car ride home when you locked your keys in the car. For the obvious things.but how are we at thanking others for the little things? The “I saved you just enough milk for your morning tea” or the “I figured since you got delayed at work you’d probably come home starving so I got us pizza”. You’ve got those too. Wow. You’re doing good. (I forget sometimes. I’m sorry)

But even more important is sometimes just thanking people for who they are, for what impact they’ve had on your life just by being in it. My husband is, of course, one of those people, but also my son. He helped me grow and become the mother I am today. If I tell him today, thank you for being you, he’ll understand my words in one way, when he’s 15 in another way, and when he has his first child in another way.

I was blessed becoming his mother. I have never had post partum depression. Even in the darkest nights with aching boobs, tiny tummy ache and baby cries I somehow always found being his mother a blessing, something to be thankful for. My wish is that I may never grow content, never get so “comfortable” (in lack of better terms) that I start taking information granted. I hope I will always remember and feel grateful for having him in my life and I hope I will always remember to thank him.

Thank you
for teaching me your wants
For teaching me your needs.
Thank you for pushing me
with more intense cries
when I get it wrong.
Thank you for rewarding me
with more intense hugs
When I get it right.
Thank you for being amazing
Just by being you.
Thank you for trusting me
to take care of you
to care for you
Thank you for making me
the mom I am today
Thank you for being you